To see what? 

That everything has changed and you need to rebuild your life all over again? 

Where will you find the clarity, the strength to do it when you feel like this??

All your doubts come back, along with that feeling. 

What happened? “Why did we have to break up like this?” you ask yourself. 

All the reasons why you split up begin to blur before your eyes. 

What hurts the most right now, is the present, screaming “you are alone”; everything in your life needs to be looked at, from your housing arrangements to your agreements (or disagreements) on kids, money, work, chores, even your health… 

-Sigh- 

You need to be in battle mode, but inside, no matter the circumstances, you feel defeated. 

Your dreams were shattered.

You feel insecure, overwhelmed, maybe downright discouraged and, what's worse:

There is just too much to face. 

You need to re-start your life. 

It’s hard to take that thought in with enthusiasm. 

Sometimes feeling anger or urgency helps, but they only get you moving temporarily until you come crashing down again with overwhelm. 

A boost that comes from your core. 

You start imagining what it would look like to recover control over your life and feel good again.

What will it take?

A part of you can tell that all is not lost, but then there are all those other parts that need to be acknowledged and healed so they can work together, like an orchestra trying to play without a director –and no matter how hard you listen, it just doesn’t sound like music-.

You need to feel coherent again: think, say and act in a single direction.

This is really hard when your emotions and thoughts are at odds and your energy has deserted you.

“If only I could have a clear mind”, you tell yourself, “I would be inspired to get ahead”.

This is only partly true for two reasons:

1. Inspiration comes from a different place than the rational mind.
2. Emotions have a knack for troubling your mind, until they are heard and sorted out.

So where do you start when everything is pressing you to act and you don’t feel up to it?

As we are social beings who thrive when we feel supported, you have resorted to friends or family members who made you feel they were on your side. 

But you realize that apart from the obvious good intention on their part, their thinking is not necessarily like yours. 

It doesn’t really help.

You really want to start over in a different way, this time for good.

You want to lay out the foundation for a new life where you…

• Stop feeling that pain but after having heard what it had to say and cleared the trauma of the separation
• Clarify your innermost desire 
• Find your inner resource to face your challenges now
• Create a feasible plan to face the different areas of your life that need tackling
•  Start acting and be supported towards your goals, one by one

If this is the point where you’re at and you know that receiving the right kind of support is what you need to be able to count on, then my one on one New You online sessions are the single most important next step you need to take right now.